Yeah, You Need to Communicate More


Every relationship has its ups and downs, no matter how effortless things might seem at the start. Sooner or later you’re going to have to put in some work. The good news is that it’s completely worth it in a fulfilling relationship.

But what if you’ve started arguing more with your other half recently and you’re not sure why? Started getting irritated with each other for no clear reason? Even been getting suspicious that they might be cheating?

Here are a few signs that you need to step up the communication in your relationship.

You’re Having Constant Low-Level Arguments

If you’re having constant, low-level arguments with your partner over small things, it’s almost always a sign that there’s something else going on behind the scenes that you need to address. It could be as simple as that one or both of you are really stressed with work and aren’t sleeping enough, or it could be that there’s a larger issue between the two of you that you haven’t properly dealt with.

If you find yourself caught in this loop, you need to find a good time to sit calmly with your partner and get to the bottom of things. “We’ve been arguing about a lot of stupid stuff recently, is there anything that’s been on your mind?” is a good place to start. “You’ve been unbelievably annoying recently” is not.

If you find yourself arguing often about where a loved one has been, it may be time to bring in help. Services like do exist to help – just know that if it comes to this, it may be too late.

A good chat, even an argument if needs be, can be like a pressure release valve. Once you’ve both let off steam, things may improve.

You’re Having Most of Your Heart-to-Hearts with Other People

Your partner is meant to be your partner, the person who you go to first with the big events and worries of your life. If you’ve ended up in a position where you’re having most of your big discussions and heart-to-hearts with other people – whether friends or family – it’s probably a sign that you need to improve the communication in your relationship.

Why aren’t you having these talks with your partner? Are they just completely uninterested? Do you feel embarrassed or insecure? Or have you both just ended up in the habit of avoiding these topics?

If your partner isn’t interested, you need to have a serious and honest talk about that, for starters. If you’re insecure, you need to be trusting and courageous enough to include them and let them know how you feel.

You Haven’t Had an Argument in Ages

This may sound like a ridiculous thing to say. Having massive blow-ups or taking constant little passive-aggressive jabs at each other is definitely not a good thing. But if you haven’t had any kind of argument with your partner for a long time, it may be a sign that your communication needs work.

Why? The right type of argument helps clear the air. It’s important to express the things that are annoying you. Never arguing may be a sign that you’re both 100% happy with each other all the time, but it’s more likely to mean you’re not talking enough.


  • Karlyn Cruz

    I honestly think all marriages go through hard times. And regardless of how old you both are, you will most likely go through midlife crisis. If it’s not one of the partners, it may be both. The key is patience. If you’re the one on the receiving end of the bad behavior, you just have to be patient and know that time will pass and sometimes it does get better.

    • I agree but there has to be a compromise in there too, you cant always be on the receiving end of bad behaviour. Communication and patience go hand in hand

  • Chloe

    It is very easy to get caught up in the little arguments, especially when you haven’t had enough sleep! I definitely need to consider the real reasons we are arguing sometimes rather then just jumping to conclusions. So hard when you are tired sometimes!

    • I can only imagine but yes when you’re tired you dont always thing straight so its important to take a step back, re-evaluate and then discuss calming with the other

  • Lena B

    Oh my, I remember before we had kids we hardly ever argued. Of course, there were little things, but never anything massive. That so changed after the kids. I guess I didn’t expect things to be different, but apparently we had totally different ideas of what it should look like

    • It must have been a shock and I know many people say talk about your expectations especially for your family but sometimes we are too in the moment to think about that future.

  • Communication is definitely a weakness for our marriage. We’re not awful, but we’re definitely not pros. I need to work on this more often!

  • paulaschuck

    I think we all can use reminders to communicate clearly at times. I know I am guilty of sometimes thinking my husband is going to do something that I haven’t even articulated. I assume he knows. That’s silly. He is pretty good at communicating.

    • I think that is our biggest fall, assuming that someone already knows instead of articulating it.

  • reddel

    Ongoing daily communication is the only way for our relationship to stay in tune. We both are not afraid to say what we feel in a kind loving way. Respect, honesty and truth the only way to go.

    • Absolutely, communicating in a kind loving way because one can communicate but not always in a positive and loving way

  • Communication is so vital to healthy relationships. I’ve seen cases where lack of communication, caused relationships to completely unravel. I agree with this post! I can’t hold things in, I have to voice my issues, but I do it in a way to not fuel the fire, if there is any!

    • Exactly, communicating with one another consciously and being kind

  • My husband and I communicate 10000%. He is the best communicator ever and he has really helped me open up when I feel the need to get things off my chest. Because of this, we rarely fight, and honestly, I never really have anything to get off my chest because I know that he and I are so open with one another — It’s a wonderful cycle, you know?! 🙂

    • It sounds like an amazing relationship, communication is key to a healthy relationship